Sunday, November 18, 2012

I made the switch to vaping!

Dear Allie,

Big news! I’ve discovered a new vice! Well, it’s not really a vice. In fact, it’s way better than smoking… it’s called vaping. And of course, like everything that happens in my life, there’s a story around it.

Now we may not get hurricanes like you do in NYC (have you recovered from Superstorm Sandy yet?), but it’s getting really chilly here in Minnie. I put on my new Bellissimo shearling jacket and headed outside.

When I got back to the table, my new client Zuri reached into her Valentino clutch, pulled out an elegant black electronic cigarette and started “vaping.” Right there, in the restaurant! She saw my eyes light up. “You vant to try vaping?” she says in her adorable Swiss-German accent.

Vaping with a martini on the first night I tried an e-cigarette
She pulled out another e-cigarette. “Dahling, this vill change your life. No more you vill smell like smoky ash tray. Vaping is smart vay to relax.”

Allie, it’s so cool! It’s a rechargeable battery with a “cartomizer” that comes in different flavors. I vaped caramel – it was so luscious, I gladly passed on dessert. Thank goodness, because I need the calories about as much as I need another pair of Manolo Blahniks!

After dinner, Zuri and I “vaped it up” at the Dakota Jazz Club. Soul singer Bettye LaVette crooned away while we took long drags from our e-cigarettes. I don't usually give my vitals, but last night, I just couldn't resist. . . the music was hot and so were the men. The guys were fascinated we could “vape” right there in the bar. There was this one really delicious guy… well, you know. I don't just attract men, I devour them!

Next month, Zuri invited me to Paris. I’m so excited to go vaping in the city of lights! You’d love my new friend, she’s so elegant! Hey! How about joining us in Paris?

You always said I was a vamp. Now I’m a Vaping Vamp! Gotta run! My phone’s ringing. . .


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