Sunday, June 2, 2013

Summertime. . . and the Men are Easy

(Note from Vita: Listen to "Summertime" performed by Janis Joplin when reading this blog.)

It’s summer in Minnesota and that means that I’m spending much more time outside.

My duplex in south Minneapolis is a wonderful combination of city and suburb -- a little more city than suburb, because the buses and light rail can take you downtown, the Mall of America or Eat Street for some Pad Thai.

I think Rhody's are pretty sexy. . . 
But unlike NYC, Berlin, San Francisco and many other cities I’ve visited recently, there are actually front and back yards with manicured lawns right here, in the heart of the city.

In fact, my neighbors try to outdo each other with showy, flowery landscaping; with the lush lilac azaleas and rosy red rhododendrons in bloom, it’s hard to tell who’s winning.

Me, I don’t spend a lot of time in my yard, because I’m too busy working, traveling, vaping and vamping.

But I do love my lawnmower – especially when he takes his shirt off.

Karl does such a nice job of trimming the rough edges on my front yard. He even comes in handy around the house.

I love to invite him in for iced tea and a vape (he was also a smoker who made the switch). I’m in my exercise clothes and he’s bare-backed as we sit, vaping, talking, taunting and teasing each other.

Because there are no expectations, we can be brutally honest with each other about what we like and don’t like in our lovers.

Viktor can see all of this looking out the window from the other side of my duplex. I fear that this tests the limits of his patience. Sending me off to Berlin to party with Tobias was one thing, but this vamp-display right in front of him really gets his goatee.

Gabrielle Solis (Desperate Housewives) had an affair with her gardener.
I mean: can you blame her?
Funny thing is: I think Viktor is more flustered by the fact that Karl can help me in places and ways that he can’t. Some guys just want to play the hero. While Viktor is incredibly creative, always coming up with fantasy-reality scenes (fantasies we act out), he’s just not as handy with his tools as Karl.

And sometimes, a vamp needs a man with tools who knows how to use them. Someone who can be her hero with a pair of trimmers.

The summer has just begun, and it's already heating up quite nicely. . .